Make your own free website on

Recommended Reading

Loss Of A Child


The Final Chapter - Unraveling Death's Deeper Meaning
By Cindi Goodenough Welch, M.A. LADC

The author wrote the book to help other bereaved parents; those seeking an understanding of after-death grief reactions; and for those searching on a spiritual level for meaning and new perspectives on death and dying.

My Teen Angel
By Sally Silagy

My Teen Angel draws on the personal tragedy of the author and 12 other bereaved families who have suffered the loss of a teen child. The book addresses specific topics such as normal grief responses, the stages of grief, dealing with the holidays, sibling survivors, on-line grief resources and remembrance tokens and rituals. It is a piognant book about how quickly our lives can change; the difficulties we have keeping up with the change, and how we can learn to live again. Email Sally.

Waking To Tears
Losing A Loved One To Violence
By Traci Bieber Nelson

An unspoken epidemic is plaguing today's society. For every act of violence there is a growing population of loved ones whose lives have been forever changed. They are the countless people left behind by victims of violence and emotionally abandoned by society. Waking To Tears exposes the depths of souls filled with pain and grief of losing a loved one to violence. The experiences are different but the grief is not isolated, it is an overwhelming emotion that wakes you to tears. No one is immune to violence. It touches all races, religions, sexuality and economic groups. Violence knows no boundaries. For every act of violence there are too many people who continue to wake to tears, fueling a victim epidemic.

Love Never Dies
A Mother's Journey from Loss to Love
By Sandy Goodman

Having someone you love die, whether expected or unexpected, is perhaps the most trying, and painful situation we face in life. In her book Love Never Dies, Sandy Goodman walks right past all the analytical, psychological lingo to, as John Edward, renowned psychic medium put it – “light a path of understanding through the darkness of loss.” Sandy Goodman has turned her personal journey following the tragic death of her 18-year-old son into a valuable guide destined to help all people who are dealing with grief over a lost loved one. Blending reality, personal experience, and compassion, Sandy advises the reader not to try to return to their “old selves,” but to find a way to be comfortable with their “new self.” This book is a thoughtful gift. Email Sandy.

Give Them Wings and Let Them Fly
Surviving the Loss of a Child
By Kymberli Weed Brady

My name is Kymberli Brady. I am a member of MPAS and wrote a book called "Give Them Wings and Let Them Fly" Surviving the Loss of a Child. Unlike other books on the subject that deal with the emotional and physical aspects of losing a child, this one deals with the "heart" issues. I am trying to put together a second in the "series" which will contain the thoughts, poetry and personal stories from other mothers and fathers. I am accepting presently submissions. I feel it is so important that the public become more aware of "our" feelings during this difficult time, along with what to say and, more importantly what NOT to say. My publisher has given the go ahead to proceed with the second book. This could be a wonderful way for others to write about their feelings and pain, and heal through them as I have begun to do with this book. Email Kimberly.

Angels Of Our Heart
By LeAnn Poile

Review By Author
My name is LeAnn Poile and I am the author of Angels of Our Heart. It is a book filled with stories written by survivors of murder victims about their stolen loved ones. In the book you will find passages written by those who have lost loved ones to murder in their very own words. They tell about their laughter, their love, their dreams and hopes, for what is most important for a survivor is that they can remember their loved ones as they were before they were victims. This is the first book of its kind, no other book focuses on the victims rather than the perpetrators. It is so important that the world knows that these beautiful people once lived and hopefully, in putting faces and names and life histories to murder victims, we can help others see how importatant victims/survivors rights are. With the death penalty in the forefront of the news today, it is time we stand and say, even in this, the victims are forgotten.

The Music in Your Brother's Name
An Open Letter to My Surviving Children
By Vicki W. Vanderveen

The Music in Your Brother's Name is the poignant insight into one mother's grief following the sudden death of her oldest child. Through poems and letters, author Vicki Vanderveen addresses each of her five children and details how their three-year old brother's death impacted their lives.

Vanderveen's candid and personal account takes the reader through the very raw emotions in the beginning of the grief process and through some very powerful spiritual visions she had which eased her pain. A must-read for every parent who has ever lost a child.

The Art of Condolence
What to Write, What to Say, What to Do at a Time of Loss
By Leonard M. Zunin, Hilary Stanton Zunin, Hilda Zunin

A reassuring and practical guide for finding the best way to respond to another's experience of grief.

When Your Friend's Child Dies:
A Guide to Being a Thoughtful and Caring Friend
By Julane Grant

A simply written, straight-forward book that will tell you what to say and do when you have a friend whose child has died. And, just as important, Chapter 1 tells you what not to say and why. An early reader described this book as a "slap-in-the-face wake-up call." After reading this book you will positively know how to comfort a parent who has lost a child, even ten years later. You won't have to memorize it; you will feel it. This book belongs in every household!

The Gift of a Memory
By Marianne Richmond (Illustrator)

With tenderness and wisdom, Harriet Sarnoff Schiff writes about the feelings of isolation, fear, anger, and loss that are common to friends and relatives when a loved one dies.

Living Through Mourning
Finding Comfort and Hope When a Loved One Has Died
By Harriet Sarnoff Schiff
A one-of-a-kind keepsake, the Gift of a Memory commemorates the loss of a special life. Through a heartfelt poem and beautiful illustrations, the book recounts the emotional journey of loss and offers the reader a wish for comfort and for hope in life again. A fill-in-the-blank format allows recipients to personalize the story. A journal in the back of the book lets family and friends preserve special memories and photos to create a truly precious memento.

Alison's Gift
The Song of a Thousand Hearts Opening
By Pat Hogan, Patrick Joseph Hogan
Alison, a vibrant child, had a mission in life to help others. In unique ways, both seen and unseen, her purpose lives on. Her fearlessness, compassion, and leadership qualities transformed her community in life and have reverberated throughout the country in her death. Alison's life was cut short by an air bag in a low-speed automobile collision. Meet Alison's father: although emotionally scarred by his loss, he starts a one-man crusade, forcing the auto industry to adopt safer air bag systems for our children.

Share a mother's impulse of love to create her own rituals in caring for her beloved daughter and forgo a conventional funeral. Come to the family's home, where hundreds of friends and relatives visit. Feel the love and support of a community as it encounters loss in its midst and comes to grips with a difficult good-bye.

Angel Catcher
By Kathy Eldon, Amy Eldon
After the death of her son Dan, Kathy Eldon and her daughter Amy created a special book dedicated to all he meant to them. ANGEL CATCHER, a guided journal for people who have lost someone close, gives to others what Kathy and Amy discovered during the years after Dan's death. Its pages are filled with beautiful quotations and original art, but mostly it offers space--to record memories, paste photographs, or draw reminders of the loved one. Color throughout.

When There Are No Words
Finding Your Way to Cope With Loss and Grief
By Charlie Walton

Written from the perspective of a parent learning to cope with the loss of his sons, this book contains practical suggestions for dealing with the tangible and intangible components of grief. Both the bereaved themselves and those who struggle to help them will find this book useful. Walton describes eloquently the physical, spiritual, psychological, and social effects of grief with descriptions of what is and is not often helpful in coping or helping. Although Walton writes from a Christian perspective, his suggestions are of a universal nature and would be helpful to anyone of any faith.

Left Behind: A Mothers Grief 
By Carol J Kifer 

Who can fix a broken heart? This crisis memoir explores questions we all ask when a loved one dies. It is the true story of one woman's struggle to survive the pain of being left behind when her 15-year-old daughter dies suddenly in a car accident. Although classified as a grief book, it is really about life and the decisions we are forced to make when our life plans are altered by tragedy. Intimate conversations between family members illustrate the differences in ways people grieve.

Psalms of Lament
By Ann Weems

Weems' son was pointlessly killed "less than an hour after his twenty-first birthday." Her grief has not left her since. She released much of it, however, in these 50 poems. Modeled upon the Psalms of the Bible, they all share the same "plot line" --beginning in painful petition, proceeding through anger and helplessness, and concluding in trust in the Lord who brings all hope. They are repetitious in their tropes as well. The lines of each are centered on the page, thereby resonantly recalling the shaped poems of the English sacred poet George Herbert (the most famous are "Easter Wings" and "The Altar" ). Weems' poems are not as great as Herbert's, but virtually anyone of religious faith who has lost a loved one, especially "before their time," will find fellowship, ministry, and healing in them.

The Bereaved Parents' Survival Guide
By Juliet Cassuto Rothman

We are never prepared for the loss of a child, yet this beautifully written, and compassionate book wisely prepares us for what comes next. Though we don't believe there will ever be a sane or normal moment again, ever so gently, author Rothman guides the reader/parent through stages of grieving and Kubler-Ross's stages of dying...and, we will survive. A grief counselor herself, Rothman shares her own and others' experiences of this incomprehensible pain. If there ever can be a "guide book" for the treacherous journey of losing a child, this book is the one. Succinct yet thorough, Rothman provides information about where to reach out for support from others, including a toll-free telephone number. Share the wisdom when it is needed, but NEVER, NEVER give your only copy of this book away!

One Last Time
A Psychic Medium Speaks to Those We Have Loved and Lost
By John J. Edward

"I reach out to those that have passed over to the other side, and reconnect them with the loved ones they left behind..." This is the remarkable true story of psychic medium John Edward. His extraordinary gift has opened up a window to the spirit world through which come messages of love, peace and reconciliation from those who have passed over to the other side.

In One Last Time, John talks about how he first discovered then gradually developed his psychic ability to foretell events and communicate with the deceased. He is also empowering people to tune into their own psychic abilities and read and understand signs of spiritual contact they may be experiencing every day without even knowing it. John Edward's fresh, honest--and at times even skeptical--approach has earned him an international following of those seeking genuine and accurate after death communication with departed family and loved ones. With warmth, humor and compassion, John tells the compelling stories of his most important readings, how they helped heal the scars of grief and gave way to more fulfilling lives for the living--lives where loved ones never cease to love you, and never really die.

A Broken Heart Still Beats: When Your Child Dies
By Anne McCracken(Editor), Mary Semel (Editor)

This is a collection of honest words, beautifully put together, about the saddest thing that can happen to a parent, a family. By reading these stories and poems, those of us who have not lost a child can glimpse, in some small measure, the pain such a tragedy brings. For those who lost a child, this book won't "make it better" - nothing can do that - but maybe there will be comfort in knowing you are not alone in your agony, and finding your feelings expressed so movingly and well.

Lament for a Son
By Nicholas Wolterstorff

Lament for a son is a journal of a dad who's son died. It was the most heartfelt, genuine book about grieving, suffering, and death that I have read. Mr. Wolterstorff does not use trivial platitudes to convey how he is feeling, because this is truly just his journal. I felt like I was not alone in my anger, frustration, and sorrow after the death of my daughter, there was someone else who was feeling the way I did. I connected with this family's pain. I also was given hope by the end of this "journey" that it was not the end of the world. I was also given the realization that humans can truly relate to the sufferings of Christ, that it is not something that is out of reach, but something that can be attained.

Sweeping Up the Heart
A Father's Lament for His Daughter
By Paul W. Nisly

"Nisly writes eloquently and intimately of his grief and religious and family struggles after the automobile-accident death of his daughter four months after her college graduation. His account is enhanced by a wide range of literary and biblical texts and by his honest questioning, deep anguish, gentle reflection, and obvious love as well as by the faith, hope, and healing which have sustained him through this ordeal." I gave this book to my husband and also a copy to Mike Roberts, (the father of the other girl killed in the same wreck that took our daughter). My husband, who is not a reader, actually read this book, a few pages at a time. Mike read it and shared it with his wife, Pam. Both felt affirmed by the sentiments Mr. Nisly shares with his readers, and recommend it highly.

Empty Arms
Coping After Miscarriage, Stillbirth and Infant Death
By Anne McCracken(Editor), Mary Semel (Editor)

This is a collection of honest words, beautifully put together, about the saddest thing that can happen to a parent, a family. By reading these stories and poems, those of us who have not lost a child can glimpse, in some small measure, the pain such a tragedy brings. For those who lost a child, this book won't "make it better" - nothing can do that - but maybe there will be comfort in knowing you are not alone in your agony, and finding your feelings expressed so movingly and well.

Empty Cradle, Broken Heart
Surviving the Death of Your Baby
By Deborah L. Davis, Phd

The heartache of miscarriage, stillbirth or infant death affects roughly 50,000 U.S. families every year. This revised and expanded edition of Empty Cradle, Broken Heart offers reassurance to parents who struggle with anger, guilt and despair after such tragedy. Deborah Davis encourages grieving and makes suggestions for coping. Added to this edition is new information on issues such as the death of one or more babies from a multiple birth, pregnancy interruption and the questioning of aggressive medical intervention. There is also a special chapter for fathers as well as a chapter on "protective parenting" to help anxious parents enjoy their precious living children. Doctors, nurses, relatives, friends and parents facing infant loss will find support and reassurance in this gentle guide.

After the Death of a Child
Living With Loss Through the Years
By Sherokee Isle and Arlene Appelbaum

"When our daughter Leilani Jean died three weeks before delivery, it was a terrible blow after having lost two other children in the first trimester of pregnancy. We had awaited her birth for 12 long years only to learn that it was not to be. This book helped us to cope and it helped me to hold on to the edge of what seemed an endless black pit and it also helped me to see the light at the end of it all. Nothing can take the pain away but this book does help soften it a lot."

The Grieving Child: A Parent's Guide
By Helen Fitzgerald

Explaining death to a child is one of the most difficult tasks a parent or other relative faces. The Grieving Child now provides much-needed guidance, covering such areas as visiting the seriously ill or dying, especially difficult situations, including suicide and murder, attending a funeral, and the role religion can play.

How to Survive the Loss of a Child
Filling the Emptiness and Rebuilding Your life.
By Catherine M. Sanders

Parents who suffer the death of a child must endure excruciating grief, and they often need help to reach the final stage of healing and renewal. Writing from personal experience and with professional expertise, Dr. Catherine M. Sanders provides a healing guide for one of life's most devastating experiences. Dr. Sanders explains the grieving process with compassion and insight. She also advises other family members and friends in how to assist the grieving parents and to cope with their own sense of loss.

The Death of an Adult Child
A Book for and About Bereaved Parents.
By Jeanne Webster Blank

The Mourning Handbook.
The Most Comprehensive Resource Offering Practical and Compassionate Advise on Coping With All Aspects of Death and Dying.
By Helen Fitzgerald

From preparing for the death of a loved one to taking care of practical matters to dealing with overwhelming emotions, this most comprehensive guide to grieving, based on the author's experiences as a grief counselor, discusses the issues people face before, during, and after the death of a friend or family member.

Remembering With Love.
Messages of Hope for the First Year of Grieving and Beyond
By Elizabeth Levang

The short essays written by people who have experienced what you are going through, and the suggestions for meditations make it a great resource for the varied emotions of grief. It makes a good book for browsing when you need some uplifting words, or when you need to know that what you are feeling is normal. I think it is especially helpful for those who have suffered the loss of a child. I have given it many times to friends who have lost someone they love.

After the Darkest Hour the Sun Will Shine Again
A Parent's Guide to Coping With the Loss of a Child

This inspiring guide written by by Elizabeth Mehren, Harold Kushner, in coping with the loss of a child combines the authors' own story with the experiences and wisdom of others who have gone through this tragedy.

Roses In December.
By Marilyn Willett Heavilin

"With deep compassion and empathy, Marilyn Heavilin reaches out to help those who are grieving find God's comfort. Having lost three sons, she knows the tremendous sorrows and struggles that come with the death of a loved one. Yet she shares how even in the winters of our lives God provides roses--special occasions, special people, and special memories--to give us strength to persevere and draw close to Him. This book will help you understand the grieving process, support family members, give insight into sibling grief, and maintain your marriage during this difficult time. You'll discover there are Roses in December." This book has been a godsend for the parents of Lora's companion in death, Lisa Roberts. This book was recommended by one of our members, Jan Hernandez.

A Grace Disguised: How the Soul Grows Through Loss.
By Gerald L. Sittser

Loss came suddenly for Gerald Sittser. In an instant, a tragic accident claimed three generations of his family: his mother, his wife, and his young daughter. While most of us will not experience loss in such a catastrophic form, all of us will taste it. And we can, if we choose, know as well the grace that transforms it. A Grace Disguised plumbs the depths of our sorrows, whether due to illness, divorce, or the loss of someone we love. The circumstances are not important; what we do with those circumstances is. In coming to the end of ourselves, we can come to the beginning of a new life--one marked by spiritual depth, joy, compassion, and a deeper appreciation of simple blessings."

This book has been, quite frankly, THE lifesaver book for me--I read one chapter at a time, slowly digesting it, identifying with it, knowing I wasn't insane...that someone else had walked this path before me, and had survived with his faith intact and actually strengthened. This book was recommended by one of our members, Jan Hernandez.

The Bereaved Parent.
By Harriet Sarnoff Schiff

This book differs from other grief writings in that it addresses the fact that the loss of a child is so extremely different from other losses. Mrs. Schiff talks about those things that only another bereaved parent would know about - not just in the shock phase of the loss, but for the long haul.

When Goodbye Is Forever
Learning to Live Again After the Loss of a Child

An open, honest account of our family's loss. This book began not as a book, but as a journal of the roller coaster ride of emotions my family and I experienced after my son Christopher's accidental death in 1985. We have tried to be totally open and honest in this account of our struggles and hope that our experience will be of benefit to others who have suffered similar losses. As you share our loss, may you also share our hope.

The Worst Loss
How Families Heal from the Death of a Child
By Barbara D. Rosof

A child psychotherapist combines anecdotal case histories and the latest research to help bereaved parents cope with the loss of a child, offering practical and comforting advice on how to overcome the disabling symptoms of grief.

No Times for Goodbyes.
Coping With Sorrow, Anger, and Injustice After a Tragic Death.
By Janice Harris Lord

The Courage to Grieve.
By Judy Tatelbaum.

"The Courage to Grieve is a bright candle along a dark, mysterious path on which none of us are equipped to travelcoping with the loss of a loved one. But it contains, I believe, far more than many reasonable and logical suggestions for handling, with courage, our aching grief over the passing of another. This excellent and sensitive book also sheds considerable light on how each of us can learn to live, unafraid, among the always present reminders of our own unavoidable encounter with the shafts of death."

Just Us.
Overcoming and Understanding Loss and Grief
By Wanda Henry-Jenkins

Just-Us: two small words which define the plight and capture the essence of what it feels like to be survivors of murder victims. This book is for anyone who has experienced the homicidal loss of a loved one.

Suicide Survivors' Handbook.
A Guide to the Bereaved and Those Who Wish to Help Them
By Trudy Carlson

"Trudy Carlson is a courageous woman. This book, written as a result of her son's suicide, demonstrated the transformative power of grief. It is the first book I would recommend to a survivor of life's worst nightmare--the death of a child by suicide. I learned so much from it. Although Carlson in no way minimizes the extraordinary grief a survivor experiences, she demonstrates how one can grow through adversity, and thus offers hope."

Night Falls Fast: Understanding Suicide
By Kay R. Jamison

"Suicide is a particularly awful way to die: the mental suffering leading up to it is usually prolonged, intense, and unpalliated," writes Kay Redfield Jamison. "There is no morphine equivalent to ease the acute pain, and death not uncommonly is violent and grisly." Jamison has studied manic-depressive illness and suicide both professionally--and personally. She first planned her own suicide at 17; she attempted to carry it out at 28. Now professor of psychiatry at Johns Hopkins School of Medicine, she explores the complex psychology of suicide, especially in people younger than 40: why it occurs, why it is one of our most significant health problems, and how it can be prevented. Jamison discusses manic-depression, suicide in different cultures and eras, suicide notes (they "promise more than they deliver"), methods, preventive treatments, and the devastating effects on loved ones. She explores what type of person commits suicide, and why, and when. She illustrates her points with detailed anecdotes about people who have attempted or committed suicide, some famous, some ordinary, many of them young. Not easy reading, either in subject or style, but you'll understand suicide better and be jolted by the intensity of depression that drives young people to it.

Who Will Sing To Me Now?
By Bonnie Hunt Conrad

When nineteen-year-old Laurie Conrad of Baltimore was shot to death in Fredericksburg, Virginia in September of 1983, the police and the medical examiner attempted to convince Laurie's family that she had committed suicide. But for those who knew Laurie, the facts just didn't add up. Despite suffering terrible grief, Laurie's mother Bonnie Hunt Conrad began a personal investigation of her daughter's shooting. She eventually uncovered evidence that was kept secret by the police for eleven years--evidence which, for family and friends, shed dramatic new light on Laurie's mysterious death. For those closest to Laurie, the mystery remains unsolved--they are searching for her killer. Who Will Sing to Me Now? is an investigation of the mystery surrounding Laurie Conrad's death. But it is also a story about mourning the loss of a loved one. Bonnie Hunt Conrad reveals her most private feelings of grief, especially those that caused her shame and made her feel, at times, insane. Bonnie hopes her pull-no punches story will help other bereaved individuals find the courage to travel the road to recovery by experiencing their grief in their own unique way. In this powerful and riveting story, you will experience a police investigation from the inside, and come to know an average family thrust into one of life's most devastating situations. Along the way you will travel through, and come to understand, the twisted hell of child-death grief.

Gone But Not Lost
Grieving the Death of a Child
By David W. Wiersbe

One reader said: Written with the Bible as a comfort zone, this book answers a lot of questions that you have about the death of your child. Having a child that died in an auto wreck and being a divorced parent, I have had no close human companionship to help me through these rough days. I am just now able to pick up the book and read it after receiving it 6 months ago. This book has helped me through many lonely times and answered many many questions. After the initial shock wears off and the questions go unanswered, this book will give you the insight that you need. You may not be able to read it initially but I promise when the time comes - you will be able to pick it up and read it. Relief is what this book offers. You can take it or leave it but you need to read it. It is wonderfully written and cuts deep. I am able to pick it up and read a couple of chapters, cry, pick it up again and continue on. My life is looking up and this book has helped.

Recovering from the Loss of a Child
By Katherine Fair Donnelly

Firsthand accounts from people who have survived the devastating loss of a child, accompanied by helpful, healing advice, offers bereaved parents comfort and support as they struggle to cope with grief.  The death of a child is one of life's cruelest blows. This comforting book offers bereaved parents, siblings, and others inspiring firsthand accounts from people who have survived this heartbreaking experience. In addition to healing advice, the bookillustrates how such deaths affect family relationships.

Grandparents Grief


Grandma's Tears
Comfort for Grieving Grandparents
by June Cerza Kolf

Grandparents are often overlooked when a grandchild dies, yet they carry a double burden--the loss of their grandchild and the sorrow of their own grieving children. Author Kolf offers support and hope in brief chapters that do not overwhelm the bereaved. She intertwines practical strategies for surviving grief with first-person accounts from grandparents.


When a Grandchild Dies
What to Do, What to Say, How to Cope
By Nadine Galinsky
The death of a grandchild is one of life's most heart-wrenching experiences. You not only grieve loss that is "out of the order of things," but you see your own child suffering and feel powerless to help. Friends and family are often focused on the feelings of your bereaved child, so your own grief may be misunderstood and minimized.

After losing two children of her own, Nadine Galinsky discovered that while support was available for bereaved parents, few resources existed for grandparents.

Grandmother's Gift
A Memory Book for My Grandchild
By Peg Streep (Illustrator), Claudia Karabaic Sargent (Illustrator)
On a lighter note, this book conveys the things one seldom says to their child or grandchild. It encompasses the family history, special stories about the family, and secret thoughts and feelings the grandparent has for their grandchild. It gives the grandchild a perspective and understanding of their grandparent that they may not have known heretofor.

[ Survivor Shopping ] [ Survivor Bookstore ]
[ My Parents Are Survivors ] [ My Mom Is A Survivor ]
[ My Dad Is A Survivor ] [ My Grandparents Are Survivors
[ Marvelicious Graphics ]

Copyright ©1996-2009 Marvel Creations. All Rights Reserved.
All matching images and content of this website are © My Parents Are Survivors and may not be reproduced. This web site was created and designed by Marvel Creations 1996-2009 which began May 29, 1996. These graphics are for the "exclusive" use of My Parents Are Survivors. Please do not take! Thank you!

Changes last made on: Tue Jun 30, 2009